THINGS I DON'T WANT TO FORGET ABOUT BEING PREGNANT!
~ LITTLE JAXSON MOVING AROUND IN THERE & TRYING TO GUESS WHAT BODY PART IS JABBING ME IN THE TUMMY. IF IT WASN'T SO COOL IT WOULD DRIVE ME CRAZY
~ I'VE EATEN MORE POPSICLES IN THE LAST 3 MONTHS THAN THE REST OF MY LIFE COMBINED (HAS TO BE THE ONES IN THE BAG FROM WAL-MART)
~ THE LOOK ON CLINT'S FACE WHEN I TOLD HIM HE WAS GONNA BE A DADDY
~ THE LOOK ON CLINT'S FACE WHEN HE FOUND OUT IT WAS A BOY
~ THE LOOK ON CLINT'S FACE THE FIRST TIME HE FELT JAX KICK
~ THE ABSOLUTE JOY I FEEL JUST SITTING IN THE FLOOR OF HIS ROOM AND IMAGINING HIM THERE
~ THE SENSE OF PEACE THAT I HAVE NEVER HAD UNTIL NOW. I ALWAYS BEEN A PLANNER, SUPER ORGANIZED - TO A FAULT I WOULD SAY. THE ANXIETY I USED TO CARRY SEEMS TO HAVE DISAPPEARED. SOMEHOW I JUST KNOW THAT THIS IS WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. THIS REALLY IS WHAT GOD DESIGNED OUR BODIES TO DO. I AM CONSTANTLY LOOKING IN THE MIRROR AND THINKING... THIS HAS TO BE GOD... THERE IS NO OTHER WAY!
~ THE WONDERFUL WAY PEOPLE TREAT ME. I COULDN'T TELL YOU THE LAST TIME I OPENED A DOOR TO GO INTO A STORE.
~ THE KNOWING SMILE OF WOMEN I PASS. I'M GONNA ASSUME ITS BECAUSE I'M CARRYING A MIRACLE NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE LAUGHING ON THE INSIDE AT THE EXPERIENCE I AM ABOUT TO EMBARK UPON...
OKAY - IF YOU ASK ME TODAY WHEN I WANT TO HAVE ANOTHER BABY - I'LL TELL YOU I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. THERE ARE TIMES THAT I JUST WANT FIVE MINUTES IN MY OLD BODY. NOT BECAUSE OF THE WEIGHT OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT... JUST BECAUSE SOMEHOW I AM NOT COMFORTABLE IN MY OWN SKIN. SOMETIMES I AM SO IRRITABLE/UNCOMFORTABLE THAT IF I COULD CRAWL OUT OF MY SKIN, I WOULD. - I DO NOT WANT TO BE ONE OF THOSE WOMEN WHO PAINT A PERFECT PICTURE OF HOW "EASY" BEING PREGNANT WAS.
I KNOW THAT THE INSTANT I SEE JAX I WILL FORGET IT ALL ~ I'M TEARING UP JUST THINKING ABOUT OUR FIRST MOMENTS TOGETHER ~ I KNOW THAT MOMENT AND THAT LOSS OF MEMORY ARE JUST ANOTHER PART OF GOD'S PERFECT DESIGN.
I KNOW I'VE SAID THIS BEFORE... BUT THE MORE REAL THIS BECOMES... THE MORE IT SEEMS SO AMAZING. GOD LET HIS SON DIE FOR US. I ALREADY LOVE JAXSON SO MUCH. I COULDN'T IMAGINE ANY CAUSE OR ANY PERSON THAT I WOULD LOVE ENOUGH TO WATCH HIM DIE FOR IT.
~ LITTLE JAXSON MOVING AROUND IN THERE & TRYING TO GUESS WHAT BODY PART IS JABBING ME IN THE TUMMY. IF IT WASN'T SO COOL IT WOULD DRIVE ME CRAZY
~ I'VE EATEN MORE POPSICLES IN THE LAST 3 MONTHS THAN THE REST OF MY LIFE COMBINED (HAS TO BE THE ONES IN THE BAG FROM WAL-MART)
~ THE LOOK ON CLINT'S FACE WHEN I TOLD HIM HE WAS GONNA BE A DADDY
~ THE LOOK ON CLINT'S FACE WHEN HE FOUND OUT IT WAS A BOY
~ THE LOOK ON CLINT'S FACE THE FIRST TIME HE FELT JAX KICK
~ THE ABSOLUTE JOY I FEEL JUST SITTING IN THE FLOOR OF HIS ROOM AND IMAGINING HIM THERE
~ THE SENSE OF PEACE THAT I HAVE NEVER HAD UNTIL NOW. I ALWAYS BEEN A PLANNER, SUPER ORGANIZED - TO A FAULT I WOULD SAY. THE ANXIETY I USED TO CARRY SEEMS TO HAVE DISAPPEARED. SOMEHOW I JUST KNOW THAT THIS IS WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. THIS REALLY IS WHAT GOD DESIGNED OUR BODIES TO DO. I AM CONSTANTLY LOOKING IN THE MIRROR AND THINKING... THIS HAS TO BE GOD... THERE IS NO OTHER WAY!
~ THE WONDERFUL WAY PEOPLE TREAT ME. I COULDN'T TELL YOU THE LAST TIME I OPENED A DOOR TO GO INTO A STORE.
~ THE KNOWING SMILE OF WOMEN I PASS. I'M GONNA ASSUME ITS BECAUSE I'M CARRYING A MIRACLE NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE LAUGHING ON THE INSIDE AT THE EXPERIENCE I AM ABOUT TO EMBARK UPON...
OKAY - IF YOU ASK ME TODAY WHEN I WANT TO HAVE ANOTHER BABY - I'LL TELL YOU I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. THERE ARE TIMES THAT I JUST WANT FIVE MINUTES IN MY OLD BODY. NOT BECAUSE OF THE WEIGHT OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT... JUST BECAUSE SOMEHOW I AM NOT COMFORTABLE IN MY OWN SKIN. SOMETIMES I AM SO IRRITABLE/UNCOMFORTABLE THAT IF I COULD CRAWL OUT OF MY SKIN, I WOULD. - I DO NOT WANT TO BE ONE OF THOSE WOMEN WHO PAINT A PERFECT PICTURE OF HOW "EASY" BEING PREGNANT WAS.
I KNOW THAT THE INSTANT I SEE JAX I WILL FORGET IT ALL ~ I'M TEARING UP JUST THINKING ABOUT OUR FIRST MOMENTS TOGETHER ~ I KNOW THAT MOMENT AND THAT LOSS OF MEMORY ARE JUST ANOTHER PART OF GOD'S PERFECT DESIGN.
I KNOW I'VE SAID THIS BEFORE... BUT THE MORE REAL THIS BECOMES... THE MORE IT SEEMS SO AMAZING. GOD LET HIS SON DIE FOR US. I ALREADY LOVE JAXSON SO MUCH. I COULDN'T IMAGINE ANY CAUSE OR ANY PERSON THAT I WOULD LOVE ENOUGH TO WATCH HIM DIE FOR IT.
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Amen, sweetie! We are all smiling because we know the miracle you are going through right now! What precious memories!
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